Interview at 6.30 pm tonight, and i’m scared shitless.

Not because of the artist i’m interviewing — i say interviewing, because making the simultaneous translation is like making the whole interview, except that the questions aren’t mine — but because i don’t have any talent for that.
Some journalists have this talent, they know how to be interesting, they know how to make a conversation instead of just asking the questions that are on a list. I don’t know if i can do that, i don’t have that particular intelligence and insight, i’m not very very smart, i don’t have the musical culture it requires, i don’t have that particular curiosity on command, even though i’m curious, and i don’t write or think about the music most of the times, i just feel it.
besides, i don’t want to be a journalist, i’m not a writer and i can’t write, it’s bad enough that i can’t write a live report when i’m not inspired to assemble words, even if i loved the show, so why should i pretend to be something that i’m not ?

I wish i didn’t care. I wish i could just translate and ask the dumbest questions without giving a damn, but the fact is that i respect the artists far too much to do that. I don’t want to be just another dumb journalist with my dumb list of dumb questions, if i’m going to do something on a professional level, then i want to be as professional as i can.
If the interview was all mine, if the questions or topics were all mine, maybe i wouldn’t feel like such a retard, maybe i wouldn’t want to turn to the journalist and ask him what the fuck a question is that ?
I have to use diplomacy and i’m no diplomat…

The only thing that really cheers me up, is when the artist or band agrees to make a couple of pictures, these are by far the only moments when i really feel at ease…
As for the rest, i have to deal with it the best way i can, and right now, it’s being scared shitless…