i’ve met my very first press editor today.
i think it went well.
i’m fine. i’m not completely realizing yet how it’s going to be to get published, to get assignments, the kind you can’t screw up, the kind where you have to follow rules and precise demands, how it’s going to be to earn money from it, how i’ll feel when i’ll see my name there.
i’m nervous. i’m confident. i have a thousand things in mind now.
like what it means to earn my living with my talent – and a lot of work -, like how am i going to learn to work and not just make pictures without really thinking about it, like…
it’s a job, and it isn’t a job at the same time.
i can say my editor, i can say my journalist – because she calls me her photographer -, and maybe i’ll come to say my magazine even.
everything’s new. everything’s strange.
and i feel new. and i feel very strange.